“Life is made up of moments. Moments create days. Days create months. Months create years. Years create life. Lose the moment and you lose life.”
Goals are awesome but when we are consumed by them to the point where we postpone our happiness and security for those moments that we achieve something, we have lost our true purpose because we have lost ourselves. I have found that the more I base my sense of security identity on financial security and having “enough” the less secure and at peace I feel. The way out isn’t to achieve financial security, the way out is to not base my security on anything in this world, on any circumstance or condition.
Security cannot be found in this world, form is always changing. The very thing I am seeking myself and security in (which is actually not a thing) can provide the opportunity and is a blessing to recognize that my attachments to the things of this world cause greater pain than joy and freedom and happiness will be fleeting illusions and mirages the more I believe I will be happy in some future moment upon the attainment of them. I tell myself that once I have a home of my own and am in a settled relationship that sense of security will come and I will feel at ease but the more I desire and chase after those things the less ease I feel, and I am more detached from this moment. Our only true safety is in this moment in this awareness of our true essence, for this awareness and being will always be and never changes. The farther you look the farther from yourself you are and the more impossible it becomes to feel that security.
Security in the worldly sense is one of the greatest illusions. How ironic it is that when there is an internal shift, a change in perspective about what is truly valuable, we become more connected to this moment and less detached with outcome and future. It is liberating, freeing and joyous to experience this moment to moment peace and no longer need any future moment outcome or thing to add to our sense of self and concept of self worth. The dis-ease I find in seeking things in order to feel complete, like I’ve made it, is the compulsion of our society for more. We need things to add value we need others affirmation and approval of us to feel valuable.
“Chase the vision, not the money, and the money will end up following you.” – Tony Hsieh, Zappos Ceo
What gives you your sense of value? Is it your job, your spouse, the number in your bank account, some future plans you have for success? If this is the case, be prepared to feel even more empty once you attain these things because when our value is attached to these things our peace has become contingent on something external rather than internal and that’s a scary place to be. Because people die and leave and their feelings change, houses burn down and can go into foreclosure, and money comes and goes. Is it your goal to attain more in order to feel more or is it your goal to not need things and circumstances to add to your sense of self?
“Some people are so poor, all they have is money.”
Perhaps this is the true essence of the saying “less is more”. You may find that your chasing goals and situations steals from your joy instead of adding to it. Watch out for too much chasing because sometimes we are just trying to run from ourselves –from being. I am humbled when I think of what Wayne dyer said about material possessions. He stated he no longer wants them at all and no longer finds value in having them. Instead he finds value in being and contentment in serving others. That to me is someone who is free. We cannot be happy unless we are free, free from the conditioning of culture and society, free from our need to find ourselves in what the world says is valuable, free from basing who we are on things because isn’t that absurd, free from the need to label ourselves as worthy and good enough based upon what we have and own.
Let’s not forget who we really are and let’s forget what anyone else tries to impose on us. Sometimes we lose ourselves in the more we do and try to be and we find ourselves in the still moments when we recognize we are enough. The more you seek to add to your value through things or attainment the farther you are from yourself. You cannot find your worth in those things because there will always be someone who has more. And the chase will always continue. And so will your depleting sense of value the moment you attain what you believed the attainment would promise in satisfaction and feeling of wholeness. so stop looking and chasing and just be. When you can do that, you have walked into “the kingdom of heaven” where moth and rust cannot destroy. You have found yourself and there is nothing more valuable than that.
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter.” – Martin Luther King