“In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.” – Anonymous
It is how we cope and react to extenuating people, situations and circumstances that impacts our lives the most. It is in these times that we truly learn to cope in an adaptive way, in a manner that protects an independent, healthy, whole sense of self. Uncomfortable situations will always arise in our lives, including those that are triggering, painful and emotionally draining. The same situations and people that used to trigger me to engage in unhealthy coping behaviors no longer impact me the same way, because I choose not to allow them to. How was I able to make this radical shift?
While the same forces may still upset me, aggravate me and cause me to feel poorly, I have the choice as to how I will react and behave towards these feelings.
It is empowering to recognize that we have the power to allow others to impact us and make us feel a certain way. We have the choice.
I make the choice to see what were before triggers with greater neutrality. I make the choice to protect my sense of self and self integrity regardless of how others treat me and their acceptance or judgment of me. I choose not to turn on myself and betray my own self value just because someone else demeans and devalues me.
Making these small choices is what it means to love myself unconditionally. It is what it means to cope differently and this is what self-respect is all about.
When I choose to love myself regardless of how others treat me and how difficult life situations get (especially ones that invoke feelings of frustration and fear), I am reminding myself that my worth is not contingent on them and that my worth has no contingencies, period.
I refuse to allow anyone or anything to make me doubt who I really I am and my true essence which is pure awareness–love. I choose no longer to identify with the ego in me, that small self that thinks I am worthless. I no longer have to react the same way nor do I have to believe what anyone else says about me, because I already know my worth, my value, and how it is changeless, formless and timeless.
Who I really am is eternal in nature and cannot be mocked, derogated and derailed because the same spirit that is in me is also in you.
Whether it is the you that mocks me or the you that loves me, nothing changes with your words and your feelings. I love that I can maintain a stable sense of self, one that cannot be marred or dismantled by changing cultures, values and viewpoints.
It is empowering to disable disempowering people and situations through shifting my own perspective about them and altering my behavior to reflect this change.
Before you act out in a way that is out of alignment with who you really are, look inside to see your own light. Don’t let others steal it from you. Shine bright regardless.
“I’m canceling my subscription to your issues.” – Anonymous