What Are You Waiting For?

“What you seek is seeking you.” – Rumi

What if you could be as happy as you will ever be, right here, right now?

What if all the financial freedom in the world could not buy you the happiness, joy and peace that you could have right here, right now?

What if the secret to having it all, was believing that you already do? Not in the material sense, but in in a way in which having “it all” would not even matter. Because when we are truly alive to each moment, when we surrender our hearts, our thoughts, our desires to the stillness that beckons us in each breathe that we take and each heartbeat that we feel, the peace that we seek in some future security or materialistic gain becomes secondary. For in each moment that we step out of the confines of our minds, we are free.

When being present to each moment, no matter the form that it takes, becomes primary, happiness no longer becomes something that we need to seek or even wait for. Our lives no longer become a paper chase, each moment no longer becomes a stepping stone, and every person no longer becomes an advantage for gain.

When we shift our purpose, we shift our meaning in the world, and happiness no longer becomes something that we wait for when x and y happens.

We resist the forms that life takes when we want things to be different than they are. We accept the forms that life takes when we allow things to be just as they are and can recognize the good in even the bad.

If who we really are is eternal and if our identities are not our thoughts and our bodies and our mortality, then why do we allow our minds to convince us that happiness is something outside of ourselves, something that needs to be sought, attained, and bought?

When we search for happiness outside of ourselves, it is only because we have not already cultivated it within ourselves. We look on the outside when we have not cultivated the awareness of that which we already are.

What are you waiting for?

Perhaps in the waiting, you have missed out on all the miracles in each moment, dreaming of the rainbow that was there all along.

Each time that we fall into the belief that the future can provide fulfillment, happiness and security, we are in alignment with the ego, fear-based thinking, that needs something outside of itself to feel complete. This is ultimately the greatest illusion and the most elusive cause of unhappiness.

Isn’t it ironic that the thing we chase after in order to bring happiness is the very thing that prevents us from being happy?

If you are looking outside of yourself for happiness, you have forgotten who you are. If you need someone or something to fulfill you, look at why you need these in the first place. The chase and pursuit of happiness outside of oneself is never-ending because it can’t be found there, in some other time or place or person.

It can only ever be found, here, regardless of the circumstances.

How to Be Confident

“I am not what has happened to me. I am what I choose to become.” – Carl Jung

Everyone has insecurities. You are not alone and unique in having them.

It is when we identify with our insecurities and weaknesses that we lose confidence in ourselves, believing then who we are our and our identities are summed up in a mental construction.

Who we are cannot be defined, yet why do we define ourselves by our weaknesses, our faults and shortcomings? Why do we focus on who we should be rather than embracing who we already are? Do we not cut ourselves off from our own power magnificence and radiance when we do that?

We identify with weakness rather than strength because we are afraid of who we might be if we were to reclaim our true identity, which is beyond the self.

True confidence emerges when we let go of ourselves and become aware of a greater more vast nature that is in everyone and everything. Being is the manifestation of true confidence, it resides in the other level of consciousness that is beyond the realm of thought.

Needing to prove something and to be better than others comes out of weakness (fear) rather than strength (love).

Striving to be your best out of a deep knowing of your potential and pure capacity is real confidence.

Needing to hide behind a mask of being good enough and acceptable comes out of weakness, not strength.

How do we differentiate between true confidence and false confidence?

True confidence arises from being in touch with raw awareness and requires a letting go of ego. False confidence is afraid to show itself and hides beneath a facade of strength, courage and showmanship.

True confidence (the real self) has nothing to prove nothing to show and already is enough. But is not fear just an illusion, a separation of what is false from real?

And what is real can never change or fade. Only that which is false can be altered.

So to get in touch with true confidence, get in touch with your true nature, which never ever changes based on form or anything of this world.

To be truly confident, let go of the self that needs to prove itself and that needs to fit in in order to be good enough. That self that is always comparing and fearing falling short.

Simply let go of who you thought you were and embrace who you really are–that which is unchanging, eternal, fathomless.

Break away from the self and from its need to cling to an idea, concept, or thing, in order to define itself.

Stop defining yourself and just be who you really are. That is real confidence.

“Confidence, like art, never comes from having all the answers; it comes from being open to all the questions.” – Earl Gray Stevens

How to Deal With Difficult Situations/People

“In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.” – Anonymous

It is how we cope and react to extenuating people, situations and circumstances that impacts our lives the most. It is in these times that we truly learn to cope in an adaptive way, in a manner that protects an independent, healthy, whole sense of self. Uncomfortable situations will always arise in our lives, including those that are triggering, painful and emotionally draining. The same situations and people that used to trigger me to engage in unhealthy coping behaviors no longer impact me the same way, because I choose not to allow them to. How was I able to make this radical shift?

While the same forces may still upset me, aggravate me and cause me to feel poorly, I have the choice as to how I will react and behave towards these feelings.

It is empowering to recognize that we have the power to allow others to impact us and make us feel a certain way. We have the choice.

I make the choice to see what were before triggers with greater neutrality. I make the choice to protect my sense of self and self integrity regardless of how others treat me and their acceptance or judgment of me. I choose not to turn on myself and betray my own self value just because someone else demeans and devalues me.

Making these small choices is what it means to love myself unconditionally. It is what it means to cope differently and this is what self-respect is all about.

When I choose to love myself regardless of how others treat me and how difficult life situations get (especially ones that invoke feelings of frustration and fear), I am reminding myself that my worth is not contingent on them and that my worth has no contingencies, period.

I refuse to allow anyone or anything to make me doubt who I really I am and my true essence which is pure awareness–love. I choose no longer to identify with the ego in me, that small self that thinks I am worthless. I no longer have to react the same way nor do I have to believe what anyone else says about me, because I already know my worth, my value, and how it is changeless, formless and timeless.

Who I really am is eternal in nature and cannot be mocked, derogated and derailed because the same spirit that is in me is also in you.

Whether it is the you that mocks me or the you that loves me, nothing changes with your words and your feelings. I love that I can maintain a stable sense of self, one that cannot be marred or dismantled by changing cultures, values and viewpoints.

It is empowering to disable disempowering people and situations through shifting my own perspective about them and altering my behavior to reflect this change.

Before you act out in a way that is out of alignment with who you really are, look inside to see your own light. Don’t let others steal it from you. Shine bright regardless.

“I’m canceling my subscription to your issues.” – Anonymous

difficultpeople